Friday, March 31, 2017

You're a Fucking Asshole

There’s a little heart someone drew on the grout between the tiles on the wall of the men’s room, right at eye level when you’re taking a piss. It’s disconcerting. Creepy. Sort of mocking.

That’s the view I had yesterday morning as I heard the telltale ding of a text message notification. It came from the stall. A few moments passed. And then I heard the occupant emit a little sigh.

“You’re a fucking asshole, man,” he declared.

Saturday, March 25, 2017


It was almost too easy to dramatize this weird trick of the mind.

Monday, March 20, 2017


“Those birds sing all day long,” said the girl

Sunday, March 19, 2017

I almost had a good time today at the sad people’s store, wandering the aisles in search of spaghetti and tonic. In from the cold rain for just a minute or two.

As I did the dishes two great movies were on at the same time: “Office Space” and “School of Rock.” Each one a sparkling affirmation of humanity, a blow against the forces of evil and oppression. I’d watch one until it broke for commercials, switch to the other, switch back. Then they were both on commercials at the same time, pills, dish soap, whatever. Got to serve the man I guess.

Saturday, March 18, 2017


The wind is a crude excavator. It has all the finesse of a pickax.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017


He's really very generous. Aren't you, Robert?”